Ok, so legit- this has been driving me nuts. I thought "If I just knew whether or not she was interested in me, it would just make everything better" ... Yeah, well, knowing... Didn't make it better...
So a week ago, she texts me saying she wanted to work on her drop kicks. I can't refuse an invitation to rugby so, I met up with her, it was early evening, and it was still really hot out, so we didn't exactly work hard, but we were out there kicking... and this is the first time I had spent any one-on-one rugby time with her in a really long time... And I was sucking it up. 90% of the kicks I made didn't go where I wanted them to, it was just embarrassing... She is a huge distraction, and its unbelievable how much it affected my game. A few times she was like "Really?" When I tried to kick it back to her and it went way off, she asked me what was wrong with me. Half joking I told her she was distracting me... ugh
After a while we just ended up sitting on the grass and talking. She starts throwing grass at me, trying to get a reaction, and im not one to back down, so I throw it back... long story short I end up destroying her. Again... I think she likes it.
Anyway, she asks me to crack her back, and I tell her I would, so I get up, cause I assume she wants it done standing cause it works better that way, but she lies out on the grass, face down. It didn't really matter to me, so I crack her back, and because I happen to be in that position, I start giving her a little massage, her back is sooo tight. All the time. She was wearing a loose, reversible basketball jersey, and it was aggravating because it was really slippery, she could tell it was ticking me off so she suggested I just lift it up.... I caved and ran my hands along her bare back... This didn't last long. I decided it was getting late and that we should go.
We walked back to my car and we stopped and chatted for a bit. Then this car drove past and it only had one headlight(If you aren't familiar with the game, look it up We call it 'Piddidle') she sees this, and calls SEX! I hadn't played this game for years, so it didn't even occur to me, but she called it, so I lost. And the penalty for losing is you must remove an article of clothing... So she joking(?)ly told me to take off my shirt. Now, again, im not a poor loser, and I abide the rules of the game, AND I happened to have a tanktop on, so I took off my shirt, threw it on the ground. It was kind of a funny moment, because I swear she blushed, but then she proceeded to pick up my shirt and put it on. She tried to run away, but I wasn't going home without my shirt, So I grabbed her and put her in a hold, until she agreed to give me my shirt back. So, half let her go, cause lets be serious, I'm not gonna trust that, so I have her, she is facing away from me, and I wait for her to take it off, but instead she just raises her arms and waits for me to take it off her. Semi-inappropriate? Yes. Totally HOT? Oh YES. There is almost nothing that tops the feeling of sliding clothes off someone you like... Ok.. very inappropriate.
After that we both went home, but continued to text. She sends me a text that says this- "What would you say if I just came out and told you I was a lesbian?" Wow, this text kinda shocked me... You don't just say stuff like that. I answered her, mostly honestly, let her know I was safe to talk to... but then I got ballsy and asked her the same thing. To which she replied "I'd be like... Bro... I thought you liked the male genitalia... But then I'd be like... Huh..I'm up for exploring.... ;)"
And there I had it. A kind of answer to my question... But it didn't make me feel better, it just opened up a whole new gate of problems... UGH FML.
I've been doing better though... It was brought to my attention that I was "Pussy Whipped" so I have been trying to stop. Last Thursday she wanted to hang out, but I had plans to go to a party. Usually I woulda ditched the party to go see her, but, Be proud of me! I didn't... And We haven't talked all weekend (Cause she's been camping and out of cell phone range, but thats beside the point.) (I miss her...)
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